A Year with Audre Lorde
When you teach about diversity, equity, and inclusion, you learn that your own journey is never complete. As a white person, I will never know what it’s like to be a person of color. I’m having a learning experience while people of color are having a living experience. The same is true for many other parts of my identity. Yet I can continue my learning experience by going deeper into the gaps of my own education.
In the DEI Learning Group for White Women, we prioritize the practices of listening and reflection. Listening and reflection help us step out of consumption and sometimes extraction. These decolonizing practices may take many forms, and today I want to share one way that I’ve prioritized these practices in my own life.
Audre Lorde has inspired me for years, and I must admit that I really only knew Audre Lorde from her quotes. I don’t remember ever studying her in school (kindergarten through graduate school). And I wasn’t really aware of her until I was in mid-thirties. In the last few years, I’ve tried to make up for the gap because I am so challenged and inspired by Audre Lorde.
The Practice
In my 2023 annual planning practice, I decided to focus on Audre Lorde for a solid year. I’m really good at reading books in quantity and speed, so I wanted to slow down my study of Lorde’s writings. I used a religious practice called Lectio Divina to allow for a more meditative approach to Lorde’s work. While this practice is centered on Bible meditations, I came across the idea of using it with any passage from the podcast, Harry Potter and the Sacred Text.
Lectio Divina is structured in four parts: reading, meditation, prayer, and contemplation. The focus is reading the passage with different questions in mind for each round. There are different versions of lectio divina questions. Here are the ones I used with Audre Lorde:
1. Round 1 – Listen with the ear of the heart. Notice if any phrase, sentence, or word stands out and gently begin to repeat it to yourself, allowing it to touch you deeply.
2. Round 2 – Reflect while you read the passage a second time with deep receptivity. Notice what thoughts, feelings, and reflections arise within you. What is being asked of you?
3. Round 3 – Respond spontaneously as you listen. Notice any prayerful response that arises within you, for example a small prayer of gratitude or praise.
4. Round 4 – Rest in presence beyond thoughts and reflections. Just be.
I set aside 10-20 minutes each morning for this practice and used two books in a years’ time – The Masters’ Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House by Audre Lorde and The Selected Works of Audre Lorde by Roxane Gay. I meditated on 12 essays and 41 poems in a year. The essays tended to take more time due to their length. And I am not a great poetry student, so I often found myself researching imagery used in the poems. Sometimes I asked other people to read the poem and share what they heard.
The Learnings
When you take time to slow down, assess reality, and contemplate new futures, the world changes inside you. That’s what I learned the most from this practice. I feel more connected to the world around me and more reflective on how I show up in the world as myself. Using this practice helped me settle into a different mindset as my heart and mind opened up to Lorde’s teachings.
I’m sharing some of my own journaling here and favorite quotes so you can see how this practice looked like each day. Please know that what I am sharing is a SMALL sample to the pages of journaling. I don’t want you to mimic my journey; I want you to find your own path. I will share links to her work when possible, but I recommend supporting Black women by purchasing Lorde’s work.
“The white fathers told us: I think, therefore I am. The Black mother within each of us – the poet – whispers in our dreams: I feel, therefore I can be free. Poetry coins the language to express and charter this revolutionary demand, the implementation of that freedom.”
· What do I not know about myself? What creativity and power lie beneath because dominant culture consumes me?
The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House
“Without community, there is no liberation.”
· When I know better, I do better. I need to educate myself about Black women and their experiences. It is not the task of a Black woman to educate me.
Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism
“We use whatever strengths we have fought for, including anger, to help define and fashion a world where all our sisters can grow, our children can love, and where the power of touching and meeting another woman’s difference and wonder will eventually transcend the need for destruction.”
· What are some ways I can decrease anti-blackness in my work?
· How do I embrace my anger rather than fear it?
“You do not have to be me in order for us to fight alongside one another.”
· How can I amplify and center the marginalized voices in my life?
· In what ways do I participate in the subjugation of others?
· How do I let the media determine whose voice is important?
Random journal entries:
“As a child, I never even noticed who wasn’t allowed into different spaces. There were so few spaces barred to me. I continue to learn the exorbitant privilege I carry in my life.”
“As Lorde travels across many continents, I am confronted and amazed at the community of women she builds in each location. Building community takes time, repetition, and openness.”
“I’ve always wondered why younger people might not choose traditional cancer treatments. Now I’m learning why. Lorde offers the practices of body attunement in the end:
· Asking for help (redeeming IOUs)
· Moving out of isolation
· Self-hypnosis for pain relief
· Visualizing her body fighting off cancer like political protests
· Writing every day”
“I feel jealous of those who heard Audre Lorde speak in person. However, would I have even heard everything she said?”
I also had many entries about the relationships between women and between mothers and children. Lorde really explores these relationships and the depths of intimacy, way beyond the physical nature of intimacy that is celebrated in our society. Other quotes and lingering thoughts are “hope is a discipline” and “dreams point the way to freedom.”
How are you prioritizing and building listening and reflection into your life?
If you are a white woman looking for more accountability and community, then look at our DEI Learning Group for White Women page for new events.